Chapter 182 – Kong Yu’s Feeling
Original and most updated translations are from volare. Please don’t read elsewhere and stop supporting theft.
Since they were young, Kong Yu had always called Jing Rong Ah-Rong, and he always called her Yu’er. It was a habit that hadn’t changed until a year ago. Confronted by Kong Yu about it, Jing Rong answered, “That was in the past. You will be married one day soon, and calling you Yu’er is inappropriate.”
“If I get married, I will naturally marry you. So, what is not appropriate about calling me Yu’er?”
Those words had always been held inside of her. She loves Jing Rong. It was a fact that didn’t need to be concealed.
Jing Rong wasn’t surprised by her words as he’d heard them countless times since he was a child, to the point that his ears were worn out. He has always treated Kong Yu as his big sister and nothing more! While he grabbed his clothes on the partition screen, he told her, “Kong Yu, I understand your thoughts, but we are no longer children, and some things should not be said!”
“I am not joking with you. Last year, I already told you my feelings clearly. I am not young anymore, and mother has often urged me to get married. This time, I left the Emerald Retreat to return to the capital because my mother is determined to settle my marriage. I also agree with her. Mother said that in two days, she will enter the palace and seek the emperor for a decree of marriage.”
“What?” Jing Rong froze and almost dropped the clothes in his hands. He hurriedly warned her, “Kong Yu, I only think of you as my big sister, and I’ve clearly told you before.”
“We grew up together. Since childhood, you always loved sticking around me. As we gradually grew up, I felt as if there was a distance separating us, as thin as a layer of cotton that might puncture at any moment, but it never did. That’s why I confessed to you. In order to be with you, I’ve argued with my mother countless times and delayed any talk of marriage until now, because there is only you in my heart since long ago. Yet, you say this to me. It makes me feel ashamed and embarrassed.”
If it had been someone else, Jing Rong would have left long ago. However, this was Kong Yu. He bowed with his hands held upfront and said, “I didn’t mean to shame you. I only…” His words were interrupted.
“Apologies for overthinking, but my thoughts cannot stop running amok. So, can you please tell me why you’re avoiding me?” Kong Yu was still serene as before.
Jing Rong felt rather helpless. He retreated to the side, lightly sighing before earnestly answering her. “It’s not like I was avoiding you. We grew up together like family.”
Kong Yu lowered her brows and took the clothes from his hands. “I didn’t come here today to speak of this with you. Let us discuss it again once your injuries are better.” She spoke frankly and shirked. Then, she brushed his clothes whilst carefully helping him dress. Suddenly, something fell out from his robe.
She lowered her head to look, but didn’t expect to see a round accessory.
Kong Yu was about to pick it up, but she was one step behind Jing Rong who took it and placed it back inside his sleeve.
“What is it? That didn’t look like an expensive bead, so what are you getting so nervous for?”
“It’s only a bead. That’s all.”
“Oh!” Kong Yu didn’t question him further.
That bead was the silvery accessory that served as Ji Yunshu’s button to fasten her coronet hat, which he stole from her before. Although it was of mediocre quality, it was something he cherished. Soon their conversation became rather one-sided, with mostly Kong Yu speaking, as most of the conversation was about her stay in Emerald Retreat.
“Although the hills are verdant and the waters are limpid, which nurtures people’s character, it became quite boring after a year. Everyday, Mother would devote herself to prayers and burning incense. She didn’t speak with me too much. There were also very few people living on the mountain. It made me recall our days together when we were young. It was so merry and joyous. Finally, I have come back to the capital. On the road, I met with Mo Ruo and we spoke about you sometimes. I heard that you had left the capital to investigate the Lin capital case for half a year. It was only recently that you returned. You must have suffered a lot, right? After seeing you, I can say with certainty that you are thinner than before.” As she spoke, she went and touched the side of Jing Rong’s handsome face.
Her smooth and soft fingers trailed along his face. Jing Rong remained vigilant and observed her melancholic expression. Then, he pushed away her hand, silently got up and walked toward the door, whilst urging Lang Po. “Send Miss Kong back.”
“Yes, your Highness!”
Then, Jing Rong left.
Inside the room, Kong Yu watched as his silhouette gradually disappeared from her sight. The wall surrounding her heart immediately collapsed, and she let go of her serene appearance. Great sadness showed on her face and the tears she held in flowed freely.
Her innately cold hands tightly clenched into fists, so tightly did she clench them that her fingers, painted with nail polish, were deeply embedded into her palms.
Lang Po came in and clasped his hands to greet her. “Miss Kong, I will send you back.”
“There’s no need.” Her tone became cold with a hint of uneasiness. She left without looking back as she didn’t like people seeing her state of mind. In small steps, she departed.
Behind her, Lang Po shook his head. “Your Highness, ah, your Highness! I am afraid that this time you have created a great calamity for yourself.”
Within East Courtyard, Wei Yi and several maidservants were chatting. When Ji Yunshu came back, she went straight to her room, but as she tried to close the door, Wei Yi stretched his hands to block it.
“Shu’er, where did you go in the morning?”
“I didn’t go anywhere!” She didn’t go anywhere because she never returned to her room.
Wei Yi approached, his face coming close to hers and he blinked. “Shu’er, are you not happy?”
Her voice wouldn’t come out. She shook her head and sat in front of her mirror, appearing lost in thought. Unknowingly, she started to fiddle with the things on the table. She felt quite flustered inside.
Wei Yi crouched next to her. His eyebrows were tightly knit into a frown. After watching her for a moment, he suddenly grabbed her frenetic hands. The warmth of his palm was felt on the back of her hand. It caused her to immediately be roused from her daze and the panic that was submerging her heart partly receded. She glanced to her side and saw the worry in his beautiful eyes.
“What is it, Wei Yi?”
“Although there are many things I don’t understand, I will try to understand them if you tell me. If you are not feeling well, why don’t you tell me? I worry when I see you like this.”
The deep concern in his eyes was apparent. Ji Yunshu caressed his head and gave him a faint smile. “I am fine. Really! So, you don’t need to worry about me.”
“But you are not happy.”
Wei Yi nodded and pointed at the hairpin in front of a box before saying, “Shu’er, you’ve been taking this thing in and out a dozen times. You’re like that when you are not happy.”
‘Indeed! Wei Yi is very observant.’ Ji Yunshu felt that if Wei Yi didn’t have his disability, he would be very intelligent. Suddenly, a bulb lit up within her mind.
“Wei Yi!” She shouted.
Right after, she shook her head. “Never mind.”
Wei Yi pouted. He tightly held her hands and lay his head on her lap whilst saying, “Shu’er, can you promise me that when you are not happy you will tell me?”
“Hmmm… Sure!” She promised him. Thus, the feeling of panic in her heart vanished. As expected, when Wei Yi was by her side, her heart would feel at peace.