TGL Volume 2, Chapter 15 (4)

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Ilya made me a necklace of intelligence! It also counters illusions, but that’s whatever. This necklace makes me smarter! It’s only now that I can appreciate how smart Ilya is. She’s so smart, she can make other people smart too! I can feel my thoughts moving faster already. “Thanks, Ilya!”

“You’re welcome,” Ilya said and sighed as I hugged her. “You’re squishing me. And don’t tell anyone about its effects, or I’ll be swarmed with requests to make these.”

“Got it!” If everyone had a necklace of intelligence, then I’d only be at an average intelligence. There’s no way I can let anyone else know; that way, I’ll be smarter than everyone else. Wow! This necklace is working already!

Before I could go off to find Softie to bug her, the boat tremored and thudded. The table in Ilya’s room shook, but I didn’t move because I was rooted in place by my Footsteps of the Giant. What was that? Were we under attack again? I focused my thoughts onto the deck of the ship, and poof! I reappeared next to a startled disciple. How come I always appear next to startled people? Hmm. Even with this necklace of intelligence, it’s still a mystery. Oh wells. “What’s going on?” Why did we land?

“Chosen Lucia!” the startled disciple said and bowed at me while cupping her hands. “We’ve reached the border of Kang County. This is a no-fly zone.”

“Kang County? Not country? Weren’t we going to Kang Country’s imperial city?” I’m pretty sure that’s where we were going. No, I’m definitely sure!

The disciple kept her head lowered. I could feel the heart devil inside of her wiggling. When did I traumatize her? Don’t tell me she was one of Softie’s suitors. “Kang Country’s imperial city is located in Kang County which is located in Kang Country. Our Kong County is also a part of Kang Country.”

…Whoever made this confusing naming system deserves to be taken behind a shed and put down. “And no one’s allowed to fly here? Then how the heck are we supposed to travel around?” I’ve gotten too used to this boat! It’s a moving mansion! I can go anywhere in the world without leaving my house! Taking away my boat might as well be taking away my life!

“There’s a city ahead that we can rent carriages to travel in.” The disciple raised her head and pointed over the edge of the boat. I squinted because the sun was too bright. Ah, there really is a city. It doesn’t really look too impressive. There’s no giant wall. There’s no phoenixes or giant clams. There’s no raging bulls or disciples flying in the air. How boring. I guess sects really were richer than cities, huh?

“Fellow brothers and sisters. We’ve arrived at the border of Kang County. Get ready to dismount.”

That was Softie! The boat has this formation that you can speak into and everyone on board will hear it. It’s fun to whisper into it at night pretending to be a ghost. I planted two heart devils that way! Ah. Maybe one belonged to this disciple. Ahem. It wasn’t me! It was a ghost. Anyways, I really don’t want to walk. I like this boat. A lot. “I have an idea!” I teleported to the talking formation and appeared next to Softie, who was startled. “Don’t get ready to dismount! We’re riding this boat all the way to the capital!”

“L-Lucia?” Softie asked. “We’re not allowed to fly in Kang County.”

“Yeah, I know. But I have a plan because I’m smart!” I pictured the tree that I saw off the side of the boat and teleported there. Whew, it was bigger than I thought, but that’s okay. With a good thwack of my hammer, it fell over. Then I knocked over the other tree next to it. I dropped them into the interspacial ring and made my way back to the boat. I didn’t teleport because it’d be faster to get where I wanted by jumping once. I landed on the ground next to the boat’s bow and pulled the tree out of my interspacial ring. Now how do I do this…? Hmm. Rope! I tied the tree to the boat before teleporting to the boat’s stern and attached the other tree.

“Lucia? What are you doing?” Softie asked from up above. She was leaning over the side of the boat.

“I attached wheels to the boat to make it into a carriage!” Aren’t I a genius? The boat’s as big as a three-story building, so it might be a little conspicuous, but I’m sure I can convince people into believing it’s a carriage with a little persuasion.

“But the way you tied the trees to the boat make it so that they can’t function as wheels…. They can’t spin.”

“They don’t have to spin, silly! We just have to pretend they do! Just fly the boat along the ground and no one will know.” This necklace of intelligence is the greatest thing Ilya has ever created. I can’t believe I didn’t get her to make me one earlier. Do you know how much easier my life would’ve been if I could’ve come up with these brilliant ideas all the time? I teleported back onto the boat and sent some qi into its steering wheel. “Full speed ahead!”

“W-wait!” Softie shouted as she ran up to me. “We can’t do this!”

Hmm? “Why not?” My plan’s perfect.

“No one will ever believe this is a carriage. I-it’s clearly still a flying boat.”

Pshaw. “And who’s going to stop us?”

“Halt!” A group of people appeared out of nowhere! Don’t instantly answer my question, world! “Flying is prohibited beyond this point!”

Softie lowered her head. “S-sor—”

“We’re not flying!” I spent so much effort attaching those wheels to the boat! I’m not going to let that effort go to waste. “This is a carriage. You can see the wheels in the front and back.”

“…Those are trees.”

“And what are wheels made out of? Dead trees!”

“…Please stow your boat.”

“This is a carriage.” I accidently retrieved my ten-ton hammer from my interspacial ring and accidently waved it at the group of people in a threatening manner.

“Are you threatening us?”

“…No.” Hey. It’s embarrassing if you call me out like that. I thought Immortal Continent natives were all about subtlety and face. Jeez. “Anyways, this is a normal-sized carriage shaped like a normal-looking carriage being driven on the road like a normal carriage with normal wheels. There’s nothing out of the ordinary here, right?”

The person at the head of the group looked at the people behind him. They all nodded. “Start the sealing formation.”

Did my persuasion fail? But I’m so charismatic! Alright, let’s give them a few whacks since they can’t recognize greatness when they see it. “Unrelenting Path of Slaughter: Breaking Madness Hammer Strike!” And … they’re gone. Perfect! I smiled at Softie and stowed my hammer. “You see that? With a little bit of persuasion, you can convince anyone that you’re right. Now, full speed ahead!”

Softie stepped towards the edge of the speeding boat and looked in the direction those people flew. “Those were imperial soldiers….”


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