Chapter 8: The Contract
“All you need to do is sign it.” Suyang shook his head and turned to leave my room without explaining a word.
“Hey! Don’t leave! Explain to me what this is!” I watched Suyang’s back view as I quickly scrambled out of bed and followed him out with the document.
He wasn’t hot tempered like I was. Suyang unhurriedly sat on the sofa, “I formulated this contract last night. Since we are living underneath the same roof, there are rules that you must comply to, and things you’re forbidden to do.”
I was annoyed and I began to flip through the document that was as thick as my thumb. I haven’t even read the content, but I had a rough idea as I flipped through the pages. By now, I had exhausted my patience.
“There are two times more rules here than from my Elementary School, Middle School, High School, and University combined!” My hands were shaking, and the paper rubbing against each other created frictional noises. I was shocked beyond words. I was honestly curious on how he had written all this.
“At the end of the day, I am a man and you are a woman. It is better we have established rules.” Suyang sat cross-legged on the sofa as he took a sip out of his coffee. He gave off a very cold vibe.
“You’re drinking coffee so early in the morning? How tired are you?” I muttered as I sat down on a chair and decided to read the “contract”.
Just as my butt was about to touch the chair, I felt a killer aura aiming straight at me on my right side. My entire body felt alert and I turned towards the source. Suyang was glaring at me viciously. I felt goosebumps.
“W-what…is it?” Why was he staring at me so cruelly for no reason?
“You’re sitting on my chair!” If Suyang wasn’t so stern about it, I would have thought he was joking. How do you distinguish between the chairs?
“Your chair? Did you stick your name on it?”
Suyang pointed behind me, “I did stick it.”
I turned around. There was actually a sticky note with “Suyang” on it.
“Well, you didn’t tell me…how was I supposed to know?…” I got up and went over to another chair. “This chair is not yours, right?”
“That one is yours.” Suyang said in a very proper tone, “This kind of stuff has been mentioned in the contract. Based on what just happened, you should memorize the contract.”
“Forget it. It’s not an office exam. Why do I need to memorize it? Is this home or hell?….” I complained as I sat down on the chair to read this modern version of an unequal treaty.
Party A: Lin Yixin, Party B: Suyang
- Hereto declare that Party A and Party B is living together until Party A’s apartment has been restored.
- Party A must not enter Party B’s room whenever she wants. Party A will only enter when Party B gives her permission.
- The living room and the washroom are considered public settings. Party B permits Party A to use, but it must be clean afterwards. Messiness will not be tolerated.
- Aside from big furniture, everything else is considered a personal possession. Party A and Party B must not mix between the two. Please place your own personal belonging in your personal space. Do not put your personal items in public space (the living room, the washroom).
As I kept reading, I felt my head expanding. I even had the urge to tear the document apart.
At a quick pace, I rushed to continue reading the clauses.
- Breakfast, lunch, and dinner will be prepared by Party A. But Party A may report expenses and ask Party B for reimbursement.
- When Party B is going through his creative phrase, he demands Party A to make no noises.
- Party A may not bring friends over unless Party B had agreed prior.
- Every night, between 8pm-9am, any sound louder than 40 decibel is prohibited.
- Party A is prohibited from wearing revealing clothes indoors.
- Party A is prohibited from airing undergarments inside public space.
- Party A is prohibited from making indecent noises while she eats; as it could negatively affect second party’s appetite.
- Party A is responsible for all household duties. Party B will check for cleanliness every Monday, Wednesday, Friday, and Sunday. Party B has the right to order Party A to do it again if he is unsatisfied.
It was getting more and more ridiculous. At first, it was “Party A and Party B”. Afterwards, it was only targeted only towards Party A. By the time I got to clause 243, I was speechless. Not only was I speechless, I was also furious.
- Hope Party A will find a job. She looks like an unemployed person.
- Hope Party A could put some makeup on. Ideally, do not come out bare faced. Too plain.
I’m probably the firstest first party in history.
“You’re too much!!” Halfway through, I couldn’t take it anymore. I slapped the so-called contract on the table and resentfully asked, “Why does every clause restrict me? Why don’t you give yourself some rules?”
“Because I don’t have any shortcomings.” Suyang stated in a matter of fact voice, “This contract was rushed overnight, so if I am missing anything, please feel free to add.”
“There are stuff to add! Party B, please do not be so full of yourself! Party B, please fix your personality!”
I was so enraged that I almost lost consciousness from anger!
“Your suggestions will be considered. Any other questions? If not, please sign.” Suyang handed me a pen.
Even though every fiber in my body cried out against doing so, what choices did I have? I had nowhere to live or go. Plus, after thinking more precisely, the chances I would break the clauses were quite low.
“I only have to sign my name, right?” As I spoke, I signed my name, Lin Yixin, next to Party A.
It was then I realized I was holding two copies of the contract. My heart felt slightly lighter. Oh, so there were only 200+ clauses…
Wait! 200+ was already a lot!!!
What just happened to me? I was almost tamed…what a close call!
“We will each keep a copy of the contract.” Suyang extended his hand at me and I gave him his contract. As for my copy, I casually left on the table. I was planning to go back to my room to sleep some more.
“Your contract.” Suyang thought I had forgotten and reminded me.
I irritably turned around, “That’s my contract?”
“Then I can place it wherever I want to?”
“I want to put it on the table. I can’t?” I purposely spoke with a lot of attitude and openly challenged Suyang.
Suyang got up from the sofa and picked up my contract as he looked down on me, “Clause 4 states that aside from big furniture, everything else is considered personal belongings. Party A and Party B must not mix the two. Please place your own belongings in your personal space. Do not let it appear in public space. This includes the living room, the washroom. You just read this, and you have forgotten already? Are you a goldfish?”