RPS Chapter 279

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Chapter 279 – If You are the One Heavenly Court Version

Heavenly music played through his speakers.

On the screen of his phone, Ye Zichen saw celestial children holding flower baskets walking past the female deities.

The candles lit up.

Those represented the lights that Ye Zichen mentioned to Yue Lao. However, since there wasn’t something as high-tech as electronic lights in the Heavenly Court, they could only be replaced by candles.

Yue Lao, with his white hair and his youthful face, wore a long red and white robe. His red scarf fluttered in the air, as he held a green mahogany staff in his right hand with a kind smile.

“It really has been some time since that old man wore this,” Taibai Jinxing’s voice rang out from the call once again.

Ye Zichen did not reply, and instead concentrated on the female deities.

Just what do the girls in the Heavenly Court eat? Their bodies and looks were both exceptional.

At the same time, Ye Zichen noticed that six crystal balls levitated around the entire stage…

“Taibai Jinxing, what are those crystal balls for?”

“They can display what’s happening here to the outside world!” Taibai Jinxing replied.

Damn.

Doesn’t that mean this If You are the One Heavenly Court version is being live streamed? I merely casually mentioned it to Yue Lao, I didn’t expect him to really do that!

“Ahem, the time is right, please welcome our first male guest!”

Not long later, Third Prince Nezha appeared on his Wind Fire Wheels, holding his Heaven and Earth Ring, while the long red scarf surrounded him as he descended from above.

Yet, the originally mighty scene was completely ruined by his shota face.

Out of the twenty-six lit candles, twenty-four of them extinguished.

The remaining two either liked shotas, or just remained lit due to good will.

When little Nezha saw that, he took a glance at the two older sisters with their candles still lit, then left with a pout.

As he left, he begun to mutter, “Tsk, who wants to marry you guys. The one I like most is Big Sister Immortality Peach Fairy… And you actually blew out my candle, tsk… I’m not gonna play with you anymore.”

“Hehe, who bullied my little brother Nezha…”

Zoom.

Great Sage Equaling Heaven, who wore a golden armor, descended from the sky in all his might, shocking every single one of the female guests on the stage.

Even Yue Lao was shocked by this monkey, before he quickly spoke up, “This is our second male guest!”

Zoom.

Twenty candles instantly extinguished. These fairies were not interested in doing anything with the monkey at all. However, what was unexpected was that the candles of the six fairies still stayed lit for him.

Ye Zichen glanced over. The six fairies looked very similar…

Ye Zichen licked his lips, “Are they six of the Seven Fairies?”

“That’s right!”

I never expected that the monkey would have something going on with six of the Seven Fairies. This really is spicy!

Ye Zichen watched on excitedly to see what would happen next…

However.

Freeze.

Everyone froze, and even Taibai Jinxing seemed to have frozen on spot.

Not long later, Great Sage Sun ran over to the six fairies’ side…

Ye Zichen became rather excited.

Am I going to see something that I shouldn’t? Should I add a censoring machine on my eyes to auto-filter what I shouldn’t see…

Ye Zichen’s heart raced as Great Sage Sun’s mouth neared the fairies…

Whoosh.

Great Sage Sun blew.

And extinguished the candles.

“Little sisters, I, Old Sun, doesn’t like your type…”

With that, Great Sage Sun snapped once again. As he looked at the extinguished candles…

“I, Old Sun, is eliminated. So bye bye!”

Ye Zichen was stunned. Just what the hell is going on with this Great Sage Sun… It seems like the incident with him stealing the Peaches of Immortality wasn’t out of nowhere, Great Sage is truly a lame guy at heart!

“The Jade Emperor has arrived!”

An unknown eunuch shouted.

All the deities looked up, and even Taibai Jinxing’s camera turned upwards.

Ye Zichen stared at the screen intently, he truly wanted to see what the Jade Emperor looked like.

When he was young, the Jade Emperor depicted in the animated cartoons of the myths were always different. Now, he wanted to see what the Jade Emperor looked like for himself.

However…

Buzz.

An incoming call popped up on Ye Zichen’s screen. As he looked at the caller ID, he really didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

He could only sigh and put the phone by his ear.

He chatted briefly before returning to the WeChat screen as quick as possible…

Yet, the video call had already ended.

“I…” Ye Zichen smiled wryly, then shook his head and returned his phone to his pocket.

I am truly at a loss for not seeing the Jade Emperor!

The paperwork for Xiao Yumei’s medical company had already been completed. Ye Zichen never expected for Elder Su to act so quickly. He had thought that the paperwork for the military needed to go through a lot of procedures and would at least take ten days or so.

Ye Zichen raised his eyebrows as he looked at the metallic stamp and the clear red military one, then handed it back to Xiao Yumei.

“With this military paperwork, our medicine is now exclusive, so we must make sure nothing goes wrong. Military-exclusive is for them to consume, and it has to heal wounds quickly. The product is to be applied on the wound for what we sell to the outside world. I’ll leave it to you to control how effective it is.”

“I naturally will pay attention to all this,” Xiao Yumei smiled kindly. “You just need to slowly wait for the money to rack in.”

“Yes, yes, yes, from now on, I’ll be counting on Yumei to support me. I have to hug your big legs tightly1 !” Ye Zichen smiled.

“Then you have to hold on tight,” With that, Xiao Yumei even reached out her long leg covered in stockings.

What a fairy.

Ye Zichen thought to himself.

Xiao Yumei smiled slightly proudly as she saw Ye Zichen’s slightly heated gaze. Then she reached out to rub his face, “We do indeed have the paperwork, but the mainland’s cosmetics market is not that easy to get into!”

“So what? If our product’s good, we’ll naturally be able to established ourselves firmly in the industry. Don’t you have confidence in our products?” Ye Zichen smiled faintly.

“I do have the confidence, but I feel like we can’t hold back against the huge number of cosmetics adverts,” Xiao Yumei replied softly.

“Naturally, we definitely have to advertise it enough, and the celebrity we invite has to be very appealing.”

“That’s not going to be easy,” Xiao Yumei twitched her mouth. “Plenty of A-List bigshots have already signed contracts with cosmetic companies. Even if we throw money out, we might not be able to invite one. However, I do know someone who has never endorsed any products…”

“Since you know, then just directly invite the person?” Ye Zichen asked.

“Do you even need to tell me that?” Xiao Yumei rolled her eyes helplessly. “Although I don’t know why she has ever endorsed any cosmetics, I will still go and try.”

“Mm, giving it a try is good,” Ye Zichen nodded then he said half-jokingly; “Who is that A-List bigshot you’re talking about? I might know her!”

“Yang Yushi!” Xiao Yumei said playfully. “My little man, do you know her? If you really do, then I will admire you to no end..”

“…”

Ye Zichen’s expression froze.

“Yang-Yang Yushi!”

Original Chapter Teaser:

Yue Lao: Let us please give a warm welcome to our first male guest! Our very own Third Prince, NEZHA!

Audience: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!

(intense clapping)

Yue Lao: Now, please decide whether you are interested in him or not!

(The majority of the lights are turned off)

Yue Lao: … Ahem… There is still 2…

Female Participant A: Third Prince Nezha, you’re soo adorable! Can I please take you…

Nezha: Whatever, I’m not interested in old hags like you. I’m only here cuz my someone really nice asked me to.

Yue Lao: Uhm…

Nezha: Yue Lao, I came already and done my part, so I’ll be off.

Yue Lao: 


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  1. In Chinese slang, “hugging big legs” (抱大腿) is relying on someone to carry you forward/to success in a certain matter.